End of Camp K

The last two weeks were difficult and amazing.

Week 4: Back to being a regular camp counselor! I really missed it last week, a lot.  I had two girl campers, both with autism this week, H and S.  Both of my girls were beautiful and affectionate, lots of hugs from them.  Also both were very homesick, a new challenge for me.  Another new challenge was the amount of runners and wanderers in our group, H being the biggest runner of them all.  I developed a twitch in my neck from constantly looking around to see where she went.  H would not stay still at an activity for more than 2 minutes, but I always got her to participate at least a little bit.  The first night she did not sleep at all and spent the hours howling at the moon and screaming and kicking the walls.  Just a slight taste to what happens quite frequently at Camp K.  Counselors were running all over the place chasing campers this week, so we got our exercise for sure!  I made a habit of standing and eating behind my camper’s chair so that when she tried to get up and run I could just push her chair back in before she could escape.  It was a challenge but a good one,  her sense of imagination and adventure rival that of anyone I’ve met, and S’s smile is quite possibly the most beautiful showing of teeth on earth.  Hard moment: getting spat at, kicked, scratched, hit and spat at again all before 8am after a night of cabin duty with the boys. 

Week 5: Well I commend you if you have made it this far in the blog posts on Camp K, I’ve rambled on a little bit but I find it difficult to limit myself when I think about my campers.  Week 5, however, was the most impactful and eye-opening week for me.  I think it was also the most challenging and most rewarding week.  My three campers were very diverse an all in their mid-20s, one (Am) had severe CP and was immobile.  She could barely move her fingers or lift her head so she required full assistance in feeding, medication, showering, diapering, dressing, everything.  Am had the most beautiful spirit at camp, always encouraging counselors and other campers and being extraordinarily sweet to everyone-her heart was so big.  She definitely enjoyed talking.  My second camper, “As” was profoundly deaf and totally blind.  We communicated through sign language into her hand and hand over hand teaching of how to do the activities.  She only needed minimal assistance and was always attached to my arm-watching her figure things out was fascinating.  L was my third camper and was very independent and a social butterfly, she had epilepsy.   I don’t think I’ve ever felt as needed as I did this week, especially for As and Am, they were completely reliant on me for everything.  For much of the week my mind was running at a million miles a minute, constantly thinking of how I could adapt the activities for my girls so they could still enjoy their experience.  This involved me imagining my life without the senses of sight or hearing, imagining my life without gross or fine motor function. Think about it for a minute-its nuts!  I only thought about these things for a week, but this is something they will live with for the rest of their lives! Near the beginning of the week I was pushing Am’s wheelchair with As on my arm as we were going between activities-as we did so many times that week.  Am, being the compassionate soul that she is, was asking questions about As, “She really can’t see anything? She really cant hear anything? She really can’t talk?” to which I reply, “Yes, she has never heard a sound or seen a color, she doesn’t experience the world as we do, she experiences it through mainly touch and smell”  We are silent for a moment, then Am lifts her head up as much as she can so that she can look up at me and As as she says, “I feel so sorry for her! I am so glad I can see and hear! I am so blessed to be able speak and listen and see!” There is nothing more humbling than hearing these words from a girl who is completely immobilized by her disability and listening to her sincere empathy for her fellow camper and friend.  What right do I have to complain about being tired or having a headache?  I can walk, see, hear, feed myself, shower myself, use the bathroom, I can run, bike, hike, I can travel independently and live independently.  We cannot take these things for granted.  These two became fast friends, As always feeling for Am’s wheelchair, Am constantly encouraging As even though she knew she couldn’t hear her.  These two young woman taught me to view the world in a completely different way, which ties in the Helen Keller quote appropriately “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart” As and Am taught me to feel with my heart in a way I never had before, and it was incredible-they shall forever remain in my heart.

Camp Kostopulos is an incredible organization that takes people who have been told “they can’t" their whole lives, and tells them they can.  I feel honored to have been a part of this organization.  This was the hardest project for me to leave.  I still miss Camp K.